Fifth Third Bank

About this location

A few stories people tell about this place

1. One morning, a regular noticed something odd in the Fifth Third Bank's parking lot—a mysterious package wrapped in brown paper sat next to his car. He picked it up curiously, but when he opened it, instead of bombs or letters, there were dozens of freshly baked donuts. Confused and amused, our regular took one bite—ah, heavenly! Turned out, an anonymous delivery driver had been dropping off free donuts for the staff and customers every week. Soon enough, the whole neighborhood knew about it, and everyone started calling the donut drops ‘the Fifth Third Fairy’s gift.’

2. One day, while customers were lining up for their daily coffee, an unexpected announcement came over the intercom: ‘Ladies and gentlemen, please be advised that due to an urgent audit, all transactions will now take place using only the letter “Z.”’ A confused delivery driver asked, 'What does a Z-dollar bill look like?' A regular replied, 'Who knows? But it must be worth zilch!' Eventually, after much laughter and confusion, Fifth Third Bank switched back to normal transactions—and everyone agreed never to mention the incident again.

3. At dawn, when most banks are quiet, a delivery truck pulled up outside Fifth Third Bank with its engine running and music blaring. The guard, dozing off, barely noticed until the cashier inside remarked, ‘Did you hear that?’ The guard yawned and said, 'Probably just some kid playing his stereo too loud.' He stretched, rubbed his eyes, and went back to his post. Later that morning, as a regular customer approached the teller window, he whispered, 'Hey, did you hear that crazy noise last night?' Everyone laughed, realizing it was just another day at Fifth Third Bank—except for the delivery driver who pretended not to notice he’d left his radio on.

4. One afternoon, a little girl pointed excitedly at Fifth Third Bank’s neon sign and asked her mom, ‘Mommy, why does that building blink like it’s winking?’ Her mother smiled and whispered back, ‘Honey, it’s not really blinking—it’s just the way those lights work.’ The girl nodded thoughtfully, then giggled and said, ‘Oh, I get it—like when Daddy pretends he’s asleep but is actually watching TV!’ They both laughed as they walked into the nearby park.