Fifth Third Bank

About this location

A few stories people tell about this place

1. One morning, a little boy walked into Fifth Third Bank and asked the teller for an envelope. When she handed him one, he calmly wrote something inside and gave it back with a smile. Everyone in line watched curiously as the teller took the note and burst out laughing. The teller read aloud: 'Dear Sir/Madam, please deposit $100 into my account. Sincerely, Anonymous Donor.' The entire bank erupted in laughter, including the manager who came running over. Turns out, it was just a regular customer having some fun on a Monday morning.

2. One day, an elderly gentleman entered Fifth Third Bank and approached the teller with a puzzled look on his face. ‘Excuse me,’ he said, ‘but I’ve been trying to withdraw money from my account for weeks now, and every time it says “Account Closed.” What am I supposed to do?’ The teller smiled warmly and replied, 'Sir, your account is not closed—it’s just that you keep overdrawing it!' They laughed together as she opened another account, this one with a higher limit. 'Welcome back,' she teased gently. The old man beamed, happy to finally understand.

3. One afternoon, a delivery driver pulled up to Fifth Third Bank in a truck loaded with crates. As he got out, someone shouted from inside: ‘Hey, isn’t that where they keep all the money?’ The delivery driver looked around nervously and whispered back, ‘I think so.’ Just then, an old lady from next door walked over and said, ‘Honey, I’ve seen them unload crates here every Tuesday for years—it’s just their new recycling program!’ Everyone laughed, and the delivery guy blushed as he drove off.

4. One night, a neighbor knocked on the door of the Fifth Third Bank manager's house and whispered, 'Did you hear? The bank is now offering loans for dreams!' The manager rubbed his eyes, thinking it was another prank. But when he went back inside, he found everyone in line holding envelopes with drawings of their wildest wishes. A delivery driver had sketched a giant penguin delivering packages, while an old lady doodled a tea party in space. Smiling, the manager announced, ‘Dreams are free here tonight—just sign up!’