About this location
A few stories people tell about this place
1. One morning, a delivery driver noticed something peculiar in the company’s parking lot—a small wooden box wrapped in old newspaper, left unattended near the loading dock. Curious, he opened it and found inside an old hat with a note reading: ‘Free hat if you take responsibility for our lost package.’ Turned out the box contained nothing valuable but a few dusty hats from a local costume shop. A neighbor later joked that maybe Westside Portland Insurance was really into disguises.
2. In the early hours of one foggy morning, an alarming sound emerged from behind the Westside Portland Insurance Company's old boiler room. It resembled a cross between a cat purring and a distant lawnmower, growing louder with each passing minute. Suddenly, a sleepy janitor poked his head out and muttered, 'Must be that new delivery guy practicing for his audition as a lawnmower in the next block.' The noise stopped as quickly as it started, leaving everyone scratching their heads until a neighbor confessed she’d been using her vacuum cleaner in the basement. The end.
3. In the middle of the night, a strange voice crackled over the Westside Portland Insurance Company’s intercom: ‘Dear customers, your policy has been adjusted—now includes rainbows and unicorns.’ A puzzled delivery driver answered, ‘Um, that sounds nice, but how do I cash in on my newfound benefits?’ The next morning, everyone found their policies had mysteriously changed—now covering everything from lost umbrellas to stolen dreams. It was the best day for claims since the company started.
4. One afternoon, while sorting through the day’s claims, an adjuster picked up a curious envelope. It had no return address and simply read: ‘For Mr. Risky Business Only.’ The adjuster opened it curiously—it contained only a single sheet of paper with handwritten words: 'Dear Mr. Risky Business, your premium is due.' The adjuster laughed aloud, realizing it was just another prank from their friendly neighborhood practical joker.