Exxon

About this location

A few stories people tell about this place

1. At the Exxon station on Route 9, a regular shouted one morning, ‘Hey, look sharp—this gas is talking!’ Everyone ignored him until they heard it too—a soft humming sound like an old car warming up. Soon everyone was listening intently, and sure enough—the hum grew louder. A delivery driver joked, ‘Maybe it’s just the ghost of Mr. Exxon checking our pumps.’ Then, from behind the counter, a voice piped up: ‘Morning, fellas! Just filling her up with some good ol’ American juice today.’ Turned out it was just the new mechanic, practicing his lines for the morning shift.

2. At dawn, when most gas stations are quiet, an Exxon attendant noticed something unusual: a delivery driver kept arriving with his truck’s headlights off, but always managed to pull up right next to the pump. Curious, the attendant asked him why he never used them. The driver replied, ‘I don’t want anyone to see my license plate.’ The attendant grinned and said, 'Well, if you’re trying to avoid being seen, maybe you should turn on your lights!' The driver looked puzzled for a moment before realizing everyone in town knew each other—including their license plates. From then on, whenever someone needed a favor from him, they’d just yell out, ‘Hey, Delivery Guy with No Headlights!’

3. At the Exxon station in downtown Chicago, a delivery driver asked one day, 'Why does it always rain just when I’m filling up?' Suddenly, an old man from the neighborhood popped out of nowhere and replied, ‘Because, my friend, God knows you’re not good with money!’ Everyone burst into laughter, including the delivery driver who realized he’d been had. Since then, whenever it rains, people gather around the Exxon station for a good laugh.

4. At the Exxon station near the old mill, a delivery driver one day asked curiously, ‘Why does that old man always wave from the same bench?’ The old man just smiled and waved back, never missing a beat. Finally, the curious driver approached him and asked if he worked there. With a twinkle in his eye, the regular replied, ‘No son, I’m just waiting for my tanker to arrive.’