About this location
A few stories people tell about this place
1. One morning, as a delivery driver pulled up outside Optum East Clinic, he noticed an odd humming sound coming from inside the building. It wasn't quite like any machinery he'd heard before—more like a distant buzzing, almost musical. Curious, he peered through the window and saw something peculiar—a small, glowing orb floating above one of the examination tables. Startled, he knocked over his water bottle, attracting the attention of a nearby nurse. Turns out it was just a new medical device testing Bluetooth connectivity. The delivery driver left with a smile, muttering, 'At least I won’t be delivering any aliens today.'
2. One day, an elderly gentleman walked into Optum East Clinic and asked the receptionist, ‘Do you know why they call it “Optum”?’ The receptionist thought for a moment before replying, ‘Because opti-mum means best, sir.’ The old man smiled wisely and said, ‘Ah, but my friend always says that when he comes in here, it’s because his opti-most doctor is too busy!’ Everyone laughed, including the receptionist, who had just learned a new clinic joke.
3. In the waiting room of Optum East Clinic, a small dog wagged its tail curiously towards an unusual sound coming from one of the examination rooms. The sound turned out to be just Dr. Smith humming while checking blood pressure—a regular occurrence. The dog, a friendly mutt named Max, decided to join him for a tune and soon both were singing off-key together. A nurse appeared in the doorway with a smile, saying, ‘Welcome to Optum East Clinic—where even our patients are musicians!’
4. In the waiting room of Optum East Clinic, a sign caught everyone’s eye: ‘Please do not use your cell phone to summon an angel.’ One day, an elderly lady approached the receptionist, holding her phone aloft. 'I’m calling my guardian angel,' she declared. The staff chuckled, but then a young delivery driver piped up, 'Ma’am, maybe you should try pressing the button for the elevator instead.'